Change is constant. Never-ending. And yet, though we’ve experienced millions of changes, we still fear the outcome each time.
Maybe it is human nature. We fear what we don’t know or quite understand.
I like to think, in general, I’m pretty open to change–to harnessing that fear into courage and viewing everything as one big adventure. After all, how boring would it be if everything always stayed the same?
Pretty darn boring.
But right now, I’m feeling a little winded and scared by everything that seems to be changing all at once. “Stressed” happens to be my middle name, right about now. As much as I am a “fly by the seat of my pants” kind of girl, I’m a little unnerved and shaken lately.
Due to personal reasons, I’m most likely going to be moving out within the next two weeks-month. And yes, it’s exciting and exhilarating. But it’s also terrifying and pretty sudden. I’ve lived with my parents, and then my mom, my whole life. At 25, it’s time to head out and stand on my own. I’m not leaving on bad terms–we’re a close family and always will be.
But I am leaving with a sense of fear. As much as I’ve always wanted to live on my own, it’s a huge change. And an even bigger responsibility.
I have to admit that I never thought about the logistics when moving out. It was always a romanticized day dream–a cute little house with gardens and animals. The freedom to do whatever I want, whenever. No cares in the world, always enough money.
How utterly wrong I was. Eventually, yes, I know I’ll get to that point. I believe in manifesting the future you want to have, and with work, it will happen. But right now, that’s not going to be the reality.
And you know what? After a lot of fear and worry, I realize that’s okay. Life is a journey, not a destination. I’m looking forward to this next chapter, as much as I’m afraid of it. Because I’m realizing now that the fear is natural and normal. I don’t need to let it stop me from enjoying my life. But instead, I can harness it and use it as a driving force. Determination is a pretty hard emotion to beat.
I apologize for being so vague. But until everything is settled, I don’t want to share too much.
I am, however, super excited for all the new content this move inspires. More on that to come.
Until then, as always, thanks for sticking with me.